The Three Lions
St. James Theatre
27 March 2015
4 Stars
Reviewed by James Garden
“David Cameron, David Beckham, and Prince William walk into a hotel suite” could be the start of a truly cringe-worthy joke, but in The Three Lions, now playing at the St. James Theatre, it is a situation from which some staggeringly brilliant comedy is derived.
The year is 2010 and the United Kingdom is desperate to host the 2018 FIFA World Cup. Russia seems to be our primary rival, although word on the grapevine is that Putin has not even bothered to make an appearance—so perhaps our boys, in their best Dad’s Army impression, will bring the bid home.
As playwright William Gaminara states in the programme, “I haven’t tried to show the real people that might be underneath their public persona, I’ve very much taken the public persona that we see relentlessly on the screen with those three in particular. You could not see three people more often on the screen. I am playing with caricature, but it’s surprising how often in the play you think ‘they probably would talk like this to each other, so it’s not entirely unrealistic either.”
Whilst these characters are in fact caricatures, one really must trust the magic of Gaminara’s words, as he takes the audience through the whole three day affair on the ground in Switzerland. If one gets lost in the sometimes racist, sometimes possibly verging on homophobic jokes that seem relatively easy, you’re going to miss the searing indictment of money within professional football, the press, and global politics. That is truly where Gaminara has set his rifle sight, and he repeatedly hits his mark with laser-like precision.
Dugald Bruce-Lockhart plays an excellent David Cameron—his wild gesticulations are completely in sync with what one might see the real PM do whilst desperately trying to look like a working man at a building site or on a factory floor with photographer’s clicking away. Tom Davey is an equally brilliant Prince William, whose slightly dull but extremely privileged outlook on life could be read as a bit cruel, and his upper class buffoonery verging on homophobic, but Davey plays with such genuine heart, that one can truly see a man stuck in his position, unable to move. Penny, the PM’s assistant, played by Antonia Kinlay, and Ashock/Vikram, played by Ravi Ajula, counterpoint the three “real” men extremely well. And “The Australian,” as portrayed by Lewis Collier, who might as well be a structural homage to Lady Bracknell is particularly excellent at telling it “like it is.”
However, one really must pause a moment for Séan Browne, playing an absolutely brilliant David Beckham. His simple, plain speech not only reads like a perfect facsimile of the footballer, but Browne’s listening skills are second to none. If, as Meisner once said, “acting is reacting,” then he truly is acting every second he is on stage. There are some lovely moments created by the tiniest changes on his face. Entire script-long set ups are paid off in a single glance, and one can hardly take one’s eyes off of the man—far more than the pretty face with an unfortunate foot-in-mouth problem.
The set and costume design of Colin Falconer is excellent—this “austerity” government staying in what looks like an easyHotel with its orange accents is particularly well considered.
Overall, The Three Lions is a spectacular night of theatre. Trust it, and the words of William Gaminara– don’t let it get under one’s possibly sanctimonious liberal skin, because, in the end, an audience is paid dividends.
